Layout: Monday, February 25, 2008
Monday
2013
It's my off day today.. Finally went to Tampines.. Had mixed feelings.. But when I got there, really felt like crying.. It's like.. I really missed my second home and seeing how my lane looks super empty makes me feel that I shouldnt have quit.. Asked Zhao Ming where was he and found him in the store.. "He" didnt work today.. Apparently, "he" was suppose to start work today but Zhao Ming said that "he" said that he bu shang so "he" didnt work.. Yeah.. But I guess it was to avoid me.. I dont know.. just guess so.. Really missed my second home.. So many memories.. After seeing everyone and laopa went off to have a coffee, Zhao Ming and I went to his lane and we talked while he stocked up on the sugar.. Talked alot, about work, about him, about me, about everything ba.. Found myself telling Zhao Ming about "him" and yeah.. He was shocked ba.. Anyway, when I sat there talking to Zhao Ming and him sitting on the trolley talking to me, felt like crying.. again.. Yeah.. But I didnt la.. Then Zhao Ming walked me to the bus stop then he headed back to work..
Nothing really happened today.. Yesterday when I told my friends about what happened, they were really concerned and though they seem pretty happy about it(my friends didnt like "him"), they still comforted me and assured that they will be by my side.. Today, chatted to Pengrui on my way to Tampines and I guess I understand why he feels so inferior and why he doesnt believe in love anymore.. Today, on my ride to Tampines, I really thought alot and.. I begin to doubt myself too.. I begin to doubt.. Is there even such a thing such as love? I dont really believe in it anymore..
Anyway, I just wanna say thanks to Guoxiong, Joyce and Xinrui.. Even though the 3 of them didnt approve of me being with "him", when they knew what happened, they still comforted me though I could feel that they were pretty happy about it.. A big THANKS to Pengrui for chatting with me today though he was in school and for making me smile and laugh today.. Really thanks gor.. Im not saying that the 3 of them arent good la.. I guess I was the one at fault when I didnt talk last night on msn after what happened.. Last night I really didnt know what to say.. And.. I knew that I would cry when I talk.. Last night Xinrui called and she asked what happened and I just couldnt say, just teared.. Sorry to the 3 of them for not letting them be by my side.. But I guess.. Last night I just really wanted to be alone..
After this incident, feel myself getting even more withdrawn.. Remembered that I said that Dolly said that I've become more quiet? Yeah, feel myself getting more and more speechless lately.. God knows why.. Perhaps I've been talking too much in my 16 years so god wants me to be quiet for awhile so he made me feel hurt ba.. Lolz..
Anyway, I really miss the people at Tampines!! They're still as funny and welcoming as before, seems as if things havent changed.. They still care alot about me, especially laopa and Zhao Ming.. Saw Vincent today as well, still as funny.. Lolz.. Yeah, Zhao Ming keep asking me to go back and help them, even said that they will let me order him and laopa around.. Lolz.. But I know I cant go back anymore.. It's time to move on le.. Now my position is at Mos so I should be working hard there and concentrate on making less mistakes..
I hope I can go out watch movie tomorrow.. If I can, most likely either watching L:change the world or P.S I Love You.. Yeah.. I got the buy one get one free ticket thingy la.. 'Cause it's my birthday month and it seems a waste not to go.... l
K la, I gtg le, will update again tomorrow if there's anything la.. Otherwise I'll be back on Wednesday with hopefully good news that I didnt get scolded.. Bye guys! [hurt..]
her sweet memory was written @ 8:14 PM